Note: I published this in March 2004 on the Libertarian Alliance Forum. Chris Tame enjoyed it no end. I think it stands up rather well after seven years. Perhaps I should do another one for Mrs Clegg! [SIG]
CONFIDENTIAL 5th March 2004
Good day and compliments. This letter will definately come to you as a huge surprise, but I implore you to take the time to go through it carefully as the decision you make will go off a long way to determine the future and continued existence of the entire members of my family.
Please allow me to introduce myself. My name is (Mrs) Cherie Blair, the wife of the late prime minister of Britain, who was put to death with all government ministers after the so-called national revival revolution of October 19th 2005.
My ordeal started immediately after my husband’s arrest on the mourning of 19th October 2005, and the subsequent take over of government by the provisional wing of the Women’s Institute. The present democratic government is determined to portray all the good work of my late husband in a bad light and have gone as far as confiscating all my late husband’s assets, properties, freezing our accounts both within and outside Britain. Yes, we took money from the American Government and
various foreign powers, but we did this always for the best interests of the right British people who has become very uppity and ungrateful four all the good things my late husband and I has done for them – eg, protection against evil doers by new criminal laws against terror and evil drugs and health and eeucation for all plus new constitution in Europe to curb turbulent and licencious ways of past.
As I am writing this letter to you, my son Baby Leo is undergoing questioning with the government which is not allowing him the combined vaccine that he so desperately needs. All these measures taken by past/present government is just to gain international recognition and please local people who celebrated five day drunken street parties after 87% vote in tv poll for my husband to be killed by pubic hanging.
Americans will not help me since beginning of their civil war following secession of all states along Mexican boarder and Iranian/North Korean invasion via tunnel under Pacific.
I and the entire members of my family plus my very dear friend Carole have been held incommunicado since the trial of my husband began in the Millennium Dome in London. I was threatened with beaten and raped, though guards looked in my face pray to Jesus and said they could not go through with latter; hence I seek your indulgence to assist us in securing these funds. We are not allowed to see or discuss with anybody.
Few occasions I have tired travelling abroad through alternative means all failed. I was repeated stopped because I had no ticket.
It is in view of this I have mandated Mr Peter Foster, who has been assisting the family to run around on so many issues to act on behalf of the family concerning the substance of this letter. He has the full power of attorney to execute this transaction with you.
My late husband had/has Eighty Thousand Million USD ($80,000,000,000.00) specially preserved and well packed in trunk boxes of which only my
husband and I knew about. It is packed in such a way to forestall just anybody having access to it. It is this sum that I seek your assistance to get out of Britain as soon as possible before the present democratic government finds out about it and confiscate it just like they have done to all our assets.
I implore you to please give consideration to my predicament and help a widow in need. At least do if for Baby Leo.
May Jesus and Carole’s crystals show you mercy as you do so?
Cherie Blair (Mrs)
Sean Gabb (away from home computer)
Director, The Libertarian Alliance (Carbon Positive since 1979)
email@example.com Tel: 07956 472 199
Skype Username: seangabb
Wikipedia Entry: http://tinyurl.com/23jvoz
Buy these novels by Richard Blake: “Conspiracies of Rome” <http://tinyurl.com/l8uj8r> (“Fascinating to read, very well written, an intriguing plot” Derek Jacobi); “Terror of Constantinople” <http://tinyurl.com/n9ugw3> (“Nasty, fun and educational” The Daily Telegraph); “Blood of Alexandria” <http://tinyurl.com/356mwdr>. “Sword of Damascus” will be published in June 2011. Buy them for your own enjoyment. Buy them as presents for your friends and loved ones.