Get it on…


Vlad the Impala

I am indebted to David Thompson for this (er) small matter:-

The fascination among Fabian fascists and other nazis for condoms – presumably to be commanded to be used by nasty low hoi-Polloi other then themselves –  has often troubled me. Libertarians are often confused with “libertines” – in fact my dear neighbour Dominic, a blameless port-drinking 40-something  husband and father-of-three with a university degree, often gets at me over this matter. He is saying that we ought to alter our name libertarian completely since it upsets what he calls right-thinking-people, and makes them think we are in favour of what he calls Free Love….he’s even a bit concerned about the free-market thingy, too.

And yet the promotion of the mass use of these little rubber machines seems to go hand in hand with socialism. VIZ:- Wehrmacht standing orders for Barbarossa were that they were specifically to be worn by the soldiers while shagging Polish and Russian girls: and British Big-State secondary schools mandate it in PSHE lessons.

The phrase “family planning” sticks in mind, as used by the socialists. I should have thought that the only time you’d use a “durex” is when you are specifically _not_ planning a family…or have I missed something?

Harking back to University days, I do agree that condoms do actually decrease the risk of pregnancy. Here’s how it’s done. There was nothing more calculated to eliminate one’s libido than, at the ciritical moment with a young lady, she’d hop up naked out of the clinch, open her chest of drawers, and get out a…. Durex! You felt immmediately that, really, she was not for you – she clearly either had it planned, in which case “you” had been “for her” all evening and so she had just been acting in front of you: or else she did this sort of thing all the time, and therefore she plainly was not “for you” but “for anyone she had decided that fancied tonight at the student union disco”. The ability to “perform” was thus immediately severely limited, and almost none of these encounters was able to be pursued. Things didn’t improve even if you managed to get one of the blasted things on either: feeling nothing, you could do nothing, and had to fake it cleverly a second or two before you lost your erection, if you wanted to keep the girl.

I don’t really kow what’s the libertarian position (sorry) on condoms: who ought to use them, who ought not, that kind of thing – perhaps someone could “put me straight”? Would the Pope know? Perhaps we ought to ask Keeley Hazell. The blog editor does, so why not me?

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3 responses to “Get it on…

  1. What on earth?
    You really are quite barking you know…

    There is surely no ‘libertarian position’ on condoms, except that people should be able to use them if they wish.

    There is certainly nothing ‘socialist’ about them.

  2. Tristan….

    I have to agree with my mate Vlad here.

    You just TRY f*****g a woman while wearing a condom, mate. You won’t be able to come at all. he couldn’t, clear;ly, and I can’t either: I think they are a contraceptive device, but not in the way it was thought to be meant. Worse: the man can’t come at all…..

    I think the whole lefty condom thingy is a gigantic FabiaNazi wind-up, and possibly something to do with FemiNazism.

  3. Also Tristan, old fellow,

    You don’t really “get” irony or satire, do you. Vlad does it too.

    And…
    He can’t reply to comments, ‘coz he doesn’t know how.