The Libertarian Alliance: BLOG

You too can decide if “WAGs” are for sex or not, here, in the “News of the World”, whatever that is.  How are the mighty fallen. I think of Ozymandias, often these days.

Good April-Fool material, and probably therefore not true, but I can’t tell yet, for our dictocrats are indeed stranger than fiction. I will treat it as “true”, for the present. 

David Davis

This is I suppose sort of political in a roundabout way.  Gordon Brown understands exactly jack-shit about how British, and especially English, people go about the metaphysical task of “being British (or English.) Thus …. he wants us to have “days” to “celebrate” certain things that are iconic of “Britishness” in his eyes and those of other Stalinists; he thinks we should have a “veterans’ day” for example … where has the man been every Remebrance Sunday for the past 90 years? 

He has obviously got the heeby-jeebies about his votariat and the franchise, and thinks that if footballist slebs can’t talk, then nobody will buy pictures fo them in “Hello”, and all the football “supporters” will blame the government, and vote for David Cameron.

I could not resist this thread on eurorealist. 

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/ topstories/ 2008/03/31/
top-football-stars-from-outside-europe-face-lingo-test-89520-
20368608/
Top football stars from outside Europe face lingo test
31/03/2008Footballers and Wags from outside Europe will have to
learn English before they enter the UK.The Home Office says new signings and their other
halves must pass new language tests to qualify for a
work permit.Immigration Minister Liam Byrne said: “Should we be
insisting all footballers or indeed England managers
be able to pass an English test before coming in? Our
proposal is they should.”"Home Secretary Jacqui Smith confirmed the plan would
also apply to their spouses too.

(2) Money talks. WAGS need not be able to speak English at all whatsoever, since all they have to do is two modern types of hand-gesture, as follows:

(A) is called “handing over the credit card”, and

(B) is called “texting”.

(3) WAGS are for sex. They are usually (but not always) pretty young girls, so it’s their job. That’s exactly why there are pictures of them in the “public prints” with their clothes off - they are “up for it”. I am told that “up for it” means “sex”. 

“Sex” is what the “Tab-Loids” are forced to report about to everyone, and is also what male hominid football-ists have “hot (or “torrid”) nights of” all the time. This part is their job. “Foot Ball” is the excuse for earning the money for “sex” and “villas in Spain”. So, the only other thing WAGS need to know is also non-verbal; it involves removing clothing and lying down on their backs, carefully remembering to spead their thighs next, so the male footballist is shown where to put his, er….thingy. This is usually carried out in “Ho-Tels”, so the staff of same also understand the credit-card-hand-gestures in advance anyway, so there is no communication problme here either.

(4) You never see the keepers of these semi-intelligent-automatic-animals (football-ists) actually speaking to them, either in “train-ing”, or in “match-es”. In both cases, the “manag-ers” (that is to say, “keepers”) jump up and down and shout silently at their captive football-ists, often using hand-gest-ures (see above.)

(5) All “Real” “estate ag-ents” (and probably Ersatz estate-ag-ents also) will understand the credit-card hand-gesture, and will be able to continue to sell “VILL-AS” (see above) in places described as “SPAIN”, to footballists or WAGS.

(6) Wireless Tele Vision firms filming such trans-act-ions will not be concerned about the lang-uage barr-iers.

So I’m af-raid I can’t see any just-if-ic-at-ion in spend-ing their own or oth-er peo-ple’s mon-ey in mak-ing them learn “Eng-lish”.